Thursday, 11 February 2016

Online Dating: Musings of a Single Blogger

the truth about online dating

Today's post will be a lot different to everything that has appeared on the blog over the past year. The first draft was saved on my laptop for a while as I spent a lot of time contemplating whether I should hit the 'publish' button.

You must have guessed by the title that today I'll be talking about online dating. I know it's not something you may want to read so please bear with me while I vent and get some things off my chest. 

I was a late starter when it comes to dating. I believed that education comes first so I spent my teens and early twenties focused on my studies. Once I graduated from university and got my first "grown up"  job at the age of 25, I decided that it was finally the right time to meet 'the one'. 

However, as someone who was shy and didn't (and still doesn't) live a busy social life, I didn't have many opportunities to meet men. So, I decided to enter the world of online dating as it seemed like a perfect way to meet 'Mr Right'. Oh boy, I was wrong. I think I should write a whole book about my experience!  

After 4 years of trying numerous dating sites and meeting players, time waters and scammers, I can safely say that internet dating has lost its purpose. What once was a great outlet for singles to meet like minded individuals to fall in love with and live happily ever after, has turned into a space for unicorn hunters. 

It seems that most men who create their dating profiles don't actually know what they want. They will often meet a woman who technically ticks all their boxes, date her for a short while and then disappear into a thin air with no explanation.  

Although this trick called 'ghosting' has been pulled on me so many times, I still haven't got used to the idea that some people don't have the guts to simply talk to you. What happened with the concept that honesty is the best policy? 

Online dating gives people too many options. As it's so easy to date multiple people at the same time, men often refuse to put all eggs to one basket. Instead they prefer to string a few women along forgetting that we are humans with real feelings. 

What's worst is the fact that some men use online dating to simply satisfy their sexual needs. Whilst there is nothing wrong with one night stands if they are safe and consensual, it annoys me when a man expects me to sleep with him just because he bought me coffee or dinner! I have my values and if I really wanted to meet a stranger to hook up, I would rather go to a club. It would be easier to meet someone that way and I wouldn't have to wonder if the person I'm meeting really looks like the one on the computer screen. 

Although online dating has shattered my confidence and left me wondering whether there's something wrong with me, I still believe in true love. I'm sure that there's someone out there for me who will sweep me off my feet. I won't meet him on or Tinder but once our paths cross, I know that I'll have the happy ending I always hoped for. 

Have you tried online dating? Do you know any success stories? 

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